So! I drinked the things. As I do. Drunk me did the drinky thing. 2019 Syrah called Nodus Tollens, by Great Southern Western. Fun fact, syrah is just what the rest of the world calls shiraz, but the dude who brought the grapes into Australia couldn’t spell. So all our shiraz are technically syrah. And all our base are now belong to us. Anyway, Nodus Tollens. It’s an ok wine, not great, but good enough to get me skunk as a drunk. Incidentally, the name Nodus Tollens comes from The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows and it’s the realization that your life doesn’t make sense anymore, that the plot to one’s own story has been lost. So that’s deep. And
I expect you’re thinking I’m gonna follow that with some profound philisophicle treatise and stuff. Things like “make your own story” and “pray Quentin Tarantino has nothing to do with the plot”.
Guess what! Nope!
That’s not what I’m gonna write about here.
But you can probably guess what I AM gonna write about. Yep, lock down! Good ole Locky D! Not to be confused with Lucky D, which is when you hang a rabbits foot from your willy and bet it all on black. And if you quote Wesley Snipes while doing it, so much the better.
Anyway, Locky D. Lock flippin’ down. We’re here again. Stuck at home with nowhere to go except the supermarket. Or a walk. Or hostipal. But mostly nowhere to go.
We shouldn’t be, of course. We should be living Our Best Lives, with high rates of vaccination, with returned citizens staying in purpose built quarantine, with financial support for those who lose income. We should, but we’re not. Because peopel voted for a religious extremist who is believes any suffering is God’s Plan and everyone just needs to pull themselves up by their own bootstraps. And who believes Victoria should suffer for supporting Labor.
Anyway, we’re in lockdown. What does that mean? It means people will be lonely. People’s health will suffer, people’s incomes will suffer. It means now more than ever we need to look out for each other. Call a friend. Donate to charity (might I suggest the amazing Sikh Volunteers Australia). Volunteer your time or energy to a cause you believe in.
But first and foremost, look after yourselves. Eat more fibre. Get some exercise, even if it’s just a walk. Call someone if you need to talk. Ask a friend if you need help. Have sex, with your partner or yourself. Read a book. Do a puzzle. Don’t waste this opportunity for self-care! Once you’ve looked after yourself, you’ll be in a better position to help others.
Anyway. Point is friends are cool, wine is awesome, cheese is the best and boobs – OMG boobs. Boobs are one of the best reasons for living there is. Firm, perky, fleshy, saggy, big, small, whatever. Every boob is sacred! They’re all fabulous and you should all give one a squeeze. Guaranteed to make you feeel better – that’s just science. But do it consensually. Enthusiastic consent is fuckin’ sexy.
We’ll get through this, people. Hopefully it’ll just be the one week, and before long we can hug, kiss, sing, dance, laugh and party together. Stay tough, stay connected, eat chocolate. I loves you.